The world’s urge for food for large vehicles retains rising. This sucks — massive vehicles are worse for the world, worse for your pockets, and worse for all the individuals they mow down. But now, the automotive obsession with measurement has come for our most beloved car: The Little Tikes Cozy Coupe.
Don’t fear — the Coupe, and its eight variants, are nonetheless round. But they’re joined by a sinister alter, a twisted parallel universe model with malicious intentions: The Cozy Truck. This un-cozy impostor is a pox, a menace, and I would like to speak about it. I don’t care that it’s been round for 12 years.
See that darling baby above, enraptured by the controls on the world’s greatest promoting automotive? That’s a really younger Steve, below two years previous if the date in the shot is to be believed. He’s sitting in what seems to be a second-generation Cozy Coupe — arguably the peak of Little Tikes design — and clearly having a unbelievable time. Sure, this can be a scene from a bygone, car-loving period, however did we actually want to vary issues so drastically? Weren’t these days higher?
The Cozy Coupe is smoothed-over, spherical, and approachable. The truck, in contrast, is all arduous edges advert sq. corners — its headlight eyes and smiling face aren’t sufficient to distract from its inherent unapproachability. It’s a meaner, extra aggressive car, and it parallels the selections grownup Americans now make when shopping for vehicles — a have to be larger, angrier, to win collisions.
The Cozy Truck additionally mirrors one other odd side of consumerism: The incessant must gender every part. Look at the Cozy Coupe above, with its purple physique and yellow roof. It’s not a “boys’ toy” or a “girls’ toy” — it’s only a toy. The Coupe does are available a pink Princess colourway, aimed toward “any little girl,” however the solely blue variant is the Ice Cream Cozy Truck. Despite the identify, it makes use of the Cozy Coupe physique, and its promo photographs present a lady behind the wheel.
The non-ice cream Cozy Truck, in contrast, is simply obtainable in Genders: The blue Cozy Truck, and the purple Princess Cozy Truck. There’s no default choice right here, nothing meant to be gender-neutral. Of course, younger youngsters of all genders can get no matter coloured toy they like, however the manner these toys are marketed and focused is evident: The Cozy Coupe’s broad attraction is not legitimate, the fashionable Cozy Truck’s gendered play is the future.
The Little Tikes Cozy Truck is a microcosm of every part fallacious with the fashionable automotive market — measurement, aggression, gendered attraction. These issues are all horrible in actual vehicles, so why are we extending them to the idealised shapes of kids’s toys? Why should we defile the Little Tikes Cozy identify with this truck, when the Coupe has been so good for thus lengthy?
Image credit score: Amazon, Little Tikes, Graphic: Steve DaSilva/Jalopnik
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